[ He couldn't focus on the conversation either, swallowing, as one star in particular suddenly got a lot more interesting than it was before. In fact, he didn't even reply, letting the moment lapse into a companionable - if weighted - silence.
Not that anything in his head was quiet. Not that even his pulse was quiet. He swore he could hear it, rushing through his ears. But he didn't say anything.
He just kept his gaze fixated on that far, unnamed star, and held her hand.
It could have been simple, like that. It should have been. And if he'd been able to keep still, it would have been. But he couldn't, and after a few seconds he shifted - his grip in hers sliding just a little bit, so that he could brush his thumb, slowly but deliberately, over the back of her hand. It was too slow to be idle, to deliberate to be thoughtless.
It was a substitute, for the kiss he wanted and knew he couldn't take. A line past platonic that was easily deniable.
Or would have felt more deniable, if he wasn't hyper aware of the texture of her skin beneath his thumb. ]
no subject
Not that anything in his head was quiet. Not that even his pulse was quiet. He swore he could hear it, rushing through his ears. But he didn't say anything.
He just kept his gaze fixated on that far, unnamed star, and held her hand.
It could have been simple, like that. It should have been. And if he'd been able to keep still, it would have been. But he couldn't, and after a few seconds he shifted - his grip in hers sliding just a little bit, so that he could brush his thumb, slowly but deliberately, over the back of her hand. It was too slow to be idle, to deliberate to be thoughtless.
It was a substitute, for the kiss he wanted and knew he couldn't take. A line past platonic that was easily deniable.
Or would have felt more deniable, if he wasn't hyper aware of the texture of her skin beneath his thumb. ]