[ She didn't answer the first question and Alex couldn't decide if he was crushed, or relieved. Part of him didn't want to know the answer, anyway. It as a bad line in questioning.

The question, though, slid another blade of guilt through his ribs. ]

I-- [ Did he? Did he know what the hell he wanted? ] ... Yeah. I can't claim my my head is totally clear, at the moment, but this ain't - this ain't out of nowhere. I just normally can... control myself better.