Alex "not in love with a spaceship" Kamal (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
donkeyballs) wrote2018-05-03 01:37 pm
donkeyballs) wrote2018-05-03 01:37 pm
Reverie: IC Inbox
IC INBOX
text // voice // video
Alright, go ahead and leave me a message, an' I'll get back to you soon as I can.
voice » un: botanist
( prax sounds exhausted and his voice is a little rough, like he's been crying. he has been. )
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[ Alex might not sound like he's been crying, but he sounds like he's utterly exhausted. And worried. ]
Everythin' alright?
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Yes. No.
I don't -
( gathering his thoughts is difficult. )
Have you spoken to Amos?
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Not in a few hours - is he alright? Did somethin' happen? Where are you, I'll come find you--
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I just. I may have done something stupid.
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[ There's a pause as he tries to think about what Prax could be talking about. ]
Did you guys get in a fight...?
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( a beat. unseen, prax buries his face in his hands for a moment. he doesn't really want to say it, but —alex won't judge him, will he? they are all on a razor's edge. )
I kissed him. And then I left because I just. I couldn't. I shouldn't have. But he looked-
He didn't look great.
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Oh.
There was a pause, and then, softly: ]
I'll check on him. But we're all - everyone's all ramped up, Prax, I don't think he'll hold it against you. [ He couldn't hold it against Bobbie. Mostly because it was his fault. ]
... Did you want to kiss him? Or just...
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( god. he doesn't know what he's feeling. muffled: )
Yeah. ( and then, a little more firmly, he repeats: ) But I shouldn't have.
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[ It's not a pressing question, but a quiet one. He didn't know that Prax had feelings for Amos but he'd suspected. So he wasn't surprised so much as he was concerned. ]
He cares a lot about you, Doc, I don't think you're about to drive him away.
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and prax is still not sure he should be talking about this, but —he can't quite seem to keep his mouth shut, either. ) I left. I just. I had to.
I should be thinking of Mei.
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... I know it feels like she's your whole world, Prax. [ His voice was still so quiet. ] And I know that she is. And we're gonna do everythin' in our power to get you back to her.
... But this ain't - this ain't coming between you and her, you know that, right? Lettin' yourself find something - something good in this damn place isn't a betrayal.
It don't mean you love her any less.
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( prax drags in a shuddering breath, audible even over the comms. it's all too much, right now, grief and worry and fear for mei, the overwhelming want and care he'd felt for amos, that he still feels beneath the focus on mei — it's too much. )
I can't, Alex.
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... You know that's okay too, right? We'll find her. We'll get out of here and we'll get home, somehow. That don't mean you have to shut down everythin' else. Sometimes we need a- need a little happiness to keep us goin'. Keep us movin'. It ain't a distraction, it's a recharge.
But if it ain't something you're ready for, that's okay too.
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( the want just hit him out of the blue, surprising but at the same time not at all, like it had been there before and he just hadn't realised. hadn't let himself see.
maybe for the better. )
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Well like I said before, we're all edgy as hell. Maybe it's - maybe if this damn music stops for five minutes, you'll have space to breathe and think about it.
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( and after a beat: ) That'd be good.
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He's pretty damn stable, though.
I think he'll be alright.
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( he hopes so. but the way amos had looked - he's not sure. )
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You sure you don't want company?
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( that's not a no. )
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That ain't what I asked, or what I expect.
Just wanted to know if you wanted some.
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Where are you at? I'll head there after.
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( a beat. )
Thank you, Alex.
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