donkeyballs | Reverie: IC Inbox

[Oh, God. Dread settles in her chest.]

No, it's your ship. Holden's ship.

[Whatever.]

Corvette class, used to be the Tachi? You used it to escape the Donnager?

[She's looking for any flicker of recognition.]

[ He looks utterly baffled, but the bafflement starts turning into genuine worry. ]

Yeah, I remember escapin' the Donnager, but--

[ He went a little pale. ]

I, uh. I can't remember how. Or what on.

[Confusion shifts to genuine concern, and she studies him careful. Is this why he can't remember her, either? Are they all losing chunks of their memory?]

...What do you remember flying that whole time? What do you remember chasing Eros with?

[ He's getting paler by the second. ]

I - I don't know, it just ain't - it ain't there, but that don't make any sense, right? It couldn't have been the Knight? We don't even have a galley on the Knight, how could I have made lasagna--

[She doesn't know what the Knight is, but she's perfectly comfortable guessing it wouldn't compare to a state of the art Martian gunship.]

You don't even remember a ship called the Tachi? Remember someone mentioning it on the Donnie?

[She's grasping at straws here and she knows it. How could he remember everything else but the Roci?]

[ He shook his head, eyes glazing over slightly as he stared down into his cup. ]

I mean - Hell, gunny, I was half out of it after the Donnie got hit, anyway. We were losin' oxygen, didn't have enough for Amos and Naomi and me, so I took a sedative. [ He hadn't even known if he would wake up. ]

But I - I vaguely remember getting to the hangar bay. Tryin' to get across while bein' shot at, and Amos got hit in the leg -- But I don't --

Christ, it's like a black hole--

[Okay. Okay, this is freaking the hell out of her, but she can't show it. She doesn't want to make this worse on him.]

You don't remember anything about getting from place to place?

I remember- I remember doin' stuff. I think. I remember chasing after Eros-- [ He paused, broke off. ]

... No. No, I don't. I remember that we did it. But if I actually try to think about doin it, there's nothing there.

[God damn it.]

You don't remember how you did it? Nothing?

[ He shook his head, slowly, almost horrified. How could he forget something like that...?

He then looked up at her, the fear all too obviously etched into his features. ]

... I'm losin' it, aren't I, Gunny?

[His expression mirrors her feelings exactly, but she tries to keep her concern off of her face.]

I don't know the hell this station is doing to us, but you aren't losing it. Maybe it won't last.

[ He wants to believe her, he does. But after everything that's happened here - he feels like the station is just chipping away at his mind one piece at a time.

He shakes his head, slowly at first, then a little faster, before he pours himself another glass. Fuck this, man.

Fuck all of this. ]

[She can't even blame him.]

...This place really has it out for you, huh?

Pretty sure this place has it out for every god damn one of us, Gunny.

[ And he just tips back the whole drink in one go. ]

[Yeah, that's true. Bobbie's not sure sitting in a bar getting smashed is going to do much for his mood, so she swipes the bottle.]

Come on. Let's go to the observation deck.

[Might as well get wasted with a view.]

[ He looks up at her, a little helplessly, and lets out a sigh. He finished off the last drop in his glass, wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve, and set down the glass on the bar as he stood up.

They could just take swigs from the bottle, then he wouldn't have to worry about bringing the glass back. ]

Yeah. Alright.

[Bobbie does just that—takes a swig from the bottle, puts a hand on his elbow to steady him, and then sets off.]

Let me know if you need me to carry you.

[She's joking. Mostly.]

I'm alright, I'm good.

[ He is wobbling, though. He didn't realise just how out of it he was until they started walking and he couldn't keep a straight line, so he leaned a little more into her hand than he would have otherwise.

Luckily, though, they somehow manage to make it to the observation deck without issue, and he flopped down on the floor in front of the window, leaning back on his hands to look at the stars. ]

There is one thing, though. If it really is - if it really is almost 2700... Mars might have a sky.

[Bobbie settles down beside him, crossing her legs and staring out toward the planet, but she glances over sharply at that suggestion. She hasn't even had time to consider that, and she lets out a breath.]

...What do you think it's like?

[ He thought about it, then just kind of shook his head wistfully. ]

Honestly, you'd know better than me, Gunny. I ain't ever seen one.

You said you were on Earth, right? What was that like?

Beautiful. Overwhelming. I could barely keep my balance at first, but the ocean was... There's nothing I can compare it to.

[ He stares out at the planet in front of them, slowly moving across the view as the station spins away. ]

Even from orbit they barely look real.

... But damn. Mars might even have some. Air. Oceans. Grass, trees...

[ There was a longer pause, and he swallowed. ]

I ever tell you that I worked with one of the terraformin' companies, on Mars? Back after I retired from the Navy.

[Her gaze is still locked on him as she shakes her head.]

No. Doesn't really fit you.

[ He gave a soft snort, then reached for the bottle. ]

Not even a little.

It was Talissa's father's company. She wanted me on the ground, wanted me to be there for Melas. [ And for her, while she was pregnant again, but when his mind got to that part of the memory it make his heart stagger and stutter and he didn't voice it. He ploughed on, instead. ]

I tried my best. I really did. But every day my best was less and less. It was hell, Gunny, I ain't gonna lie. I wouldn't wish a desk job on anyone.

[She lets out a breath. She can see why Talissa wanted him around, but Christ, a desk job would make her want to claw her eyes out.]

I get why you left. I probably would have, too.

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i realised we could just use this thread since that's what they're doing anyway

yesss

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